I read an article a while back (I can't remember who wrote it) about people who are so busy all the time that you have to wonder if they "keep" themselves busy on purpose. Always busy...always. What a predicament to be in, huh? It's chaotic. Chaos is hectic. It keeps you too busy to think, too busy to see, too busy to feel, just too busy from yourself. Being too busy reflects everything about you - your choices, your goals, your truth, your growth. I then realized, "Uh-oh, I'm addicted to chaos!"
You see, keeping busy wasn't something I did on purpose. Well, maybe at first I was trying to get over a painful event in my life, but then after that the busyness became natural for me. I was so used to it. It became my lifestyle; I needed it. In the long run, though, it held me back. After reading that article, I realized I was avoiding myself. "Avoiding myself? Wow...interesting," I remember thinking to myself.
When you keep constantly busy, you end up just masking the underlying issues that need your attention - the areas about yourself and of your life that needs to be fixed; healed. No one is perfect. There’s something damaging in every person that needs to be healed. Whether it’s minor or traumatic, if you don’t know what it is, it won’t be fixed. And so, you can’t move forward. You're just stuck. The same patterns will happen over and over again.
Filling your schedule with things like errands, work, chores, social plans, other people’s problems, worrying, etc, is an avoidance tactic. When you think about your schedule, ask yourself, “Self? Where is “ME” on this list?”
Time for yourself is not only healthy for your mind, body, and soul, it will put your life in a state of peace, happiness, and joy. You don't want to end up becoming physically sick, because you've been neglecting yourself. When this happens, it's a message from the Universe telling you it's time to slow down.
I spent a good year or two researching, attending group sessions, and participating in open panels in order to learn and revamp my life. I realized I needed to slow down and re-evaluate everything about me in order to be a better person. To be able to do that, I must make myself a priority. I cannot help myself or others if I am not at my best.
Did a light bulb just go off in your head? That's exactly what happened to me. I would be more useful to myself and everyone around me, if I was simply a "whole" ME. Too much chaos leaves us feeling disconnected from who we truly are. Nothing will ever seem like it’s enough. You find yourself bored and wishing you had this or that or even blaming the people around you for your unhappiness. Guess what, that’s a crock of shit!
The secret to a life you want is YOU. Take time for self-evaluation. You may not like what you discover, but instead of denying it (denial is a form of fear, by the way)...embrace it. Dig deep inward and just listen. You will know what you have to do. You will know what needs to be fixed. Put some effort into it and you, along with those around you, will reap the benefits. You will feel amazing!